Marriages are a unity of two separate individuals that once vowed to do with no other until death do us part. Only problem is that the death in 'death do us part' seems to refer more to the death of a persons moral fibers more so than the death of the individual themselves.
The death of those moral fibers is first present when a person (husband or wife) takes it unto themselves to hit the haystack with another other than the person they vowed to be faithful to when they exchanged their wedding vows.
In fact the first signs of cheating are usually present well before the person decides to jump on the neighbors spouse or the office boy or girl. The first signs are usually overlooked, though, and it is usually not until the haystack has been somewhat leveled that any husband or wife realizes that the first signs of cheating were clearly visible all along.
Regardless of the fact that the signs of cheating are visible and can be seen by some, but not others, cheating in all of it's forms - not just physical - is a surefire way to push a marriage to it's breaking point and if this happens, then there is the need for some serious thinking to be done about how to save a broken marriage, or even should my broken marriage even be saved?
Whatever the choice, many will tell you that rebuilding their marriage was worth it and that their marriage is now better than ever before as a result.
Perform your own due diligence and think about what you want from your marriage in the future and then do whatever is necessary to achieve it.
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Help To Save A Marriage After Infidelity
There is no secret as to the fact that 'in most cases' infidelity is a real deal breaker and saving a marriage after infidelity is usually not even an option that people are willing to consider.
I can also 'honestly' say that if you are here reading this article, then you are in the minority group of people that is looking for help to save a marriage after infidelity. For that is the title of this particular article and it is written for YOU.
The kind of help you are looking for is unknown to me, therefore I shall introduce a couple of different alternatives and hope that one or all of them can become useful advice for you.
If you are still not sure whether or not your spouse is actually having an affair, then the best advice I can give you is for you to ASK. The way in which you do this is important, though... so for a list of questions that you can ask your spouse, visit: www.aftertheaffair.info
If the details of the affair are already known to you, then you are probably going to have to do a fair amount of soul searching to figure out if fixing your broken marriage is an option that you would be willing to invest your time, money and effort into. Then if you decide that it is the way in which you want to travel, you will then need to learn how to save a broken marriage.
The good news is that anything can be learned, even how to rebuild your marriage.
Many learn it and then do it successfully, and many will even tell you that their new life and marriage is better than the old one, so what are you waiting for?
I can also 'honestly' say that if you are here reading this article, then you are in the minority group of people that is looking for help to save a marriage after infidelity. For that is the title of this particular article and it is written for YOU.
The kind of help you are looking for is unknown to me, therefore I shall introduce a couple of different alternatives and hope that one or all of them can become useful advice for you.
If you are still not sure whether or not your spouse is actually having an affair, then the best advice I can give you is for you to ASK. The way in which you do this is important, though... so for a list of questions that you can ask your spouse, visit: www.aftertheaffair.info
If the details of the affair are already known to you, then you are probably going to have to do a fair amount of soul searching to figure out if fixing your broken marriage is an option that you would be willing to invest your time, money and effort into. Then if you decide that it is the way in which you want to travel, you will then need to learn how to save a broken marriage.
The good news is that anything can be learned, even how to rebuild your marriage.
Many learn it and then do it successfully, and many will even tell you that their new life and marriage is better than the old one, so what are you waiting for?
Saturday, February 26, 2011
How To Save A Marriage After Cheating
Cheating is not a very productive way to pass the time and it hurts so many people. So, why is it that so many people choose to willfully commit adultery and inflict huge amounts of pain on the people that they love - their wives, husbands, girlfriends, boyfriends, and even their kids, if they are old enough to understand at all?
They choose to do it because a) they are idiots, and b) they fail to gauge the significance of their unity with their spouse and don't think that their actions could possibly result in everything that they have built being flushed down the toilet.
But, all that being said, some people just can not help themselves or they were intoxicated and didn't realize what they were doing until they had already crossed the point of no return. It is such people, the ones who did not mean for it to happen, that are worth keeping around for the long haul. Because if they didn't mean it, then it is a sure bet that they will be a couple of hundred percent more careful in the future.
If you fall into this category, it is also very likely that you are interested in learning how to save your marriage after cheating, but you first must be willing to accept full responsibility for your actions.
The marital road is a long and windy road and sometimes there are roadblocks as well as other objects that get thrust in our way. The good news is that marriages can and do survive after affairs and yours can, too.
Go and win your spouses trust and love back again. You won't be sorry! Oh, and try not to be an idiot in the meantime.
They choose to do it because a) they are idiots, and b) they fail to gauge the significance of their unity with their spouse and don't think that their actions could possibly result in everything that they have built being flushed down the toilet.
But, all that being said, some people just can not help themselves or they were intoxicated and didn't realize what they were doing until they had already crossed the point of no return. It is such people, the ones who did not mean for it to happen, that are worth keeping around for the long haul. Because if they didn't mean it, then it is a sure bet that they will be a couple of hundred percent more careful in the future.
If you fall into this category, it is also very likely that you are interested in learning how to save your marriage after cheating, but you first must be willing to accept full responsibility for your actions.
The marital road is a long and windy road and sometimes there are roadblocks as well as other objects that get thrust in our way. The good news is that marriages can and do survive after affairs and yours can, too.
Go and win your spouses trust and love back again. You won't be sorry! Oh, and try not to be an idiot in the meantime.
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Useful Advice And Help To Save A Marriage
Not all marriages need saving, but occasionally some of them do. Let's look at a few reasons why it would be possible or even necessary to save a marriage.
Assuming that a spouse (either one it does not matter) has decided to jump on the haystack and roll around in the hay with another, other than you (their spouse / partner). If all my indicators are working properly, this romp in the hay constitutes an affair, does it not? It does. But... If you are to consider the circumstances of such an event, you may quickly be able to establish whether or not your marriage is even worth saving.
If, for example, the affair was premeditated - meaning that it was deviated by your spouse, they planned it - then your spouse is an idiot and you need to give him or her a fair old kick in the pants. If on the other hand, the affair was NOT premeditated, purely accidental, your spouse lost control of all muscular function except for those muscles located you know where and found himself or herself covered in hay almost involuntarily, then maybe you should consider giving them a second chance accompanied by a small kick in the pants just to make yourself feel a little bit better!
You see, a spouse that has cheated accidentally might still be worth keeping around, if not just to mow the lawn or do the washing, because if they are sorry, then you can almost guarantee that they will be a couple of hundred percent more careful in the future.
I hope my light hearted attempt at turning a bad situation into a humorous article that is easy to read does not offend you. Also, if you are at all leaning toward the rebuild my marriage side, then maybe you need to consider finding some outside help to save your marriage.
I wish you luck.
Assuming that a spouse (either one it does not matter) has decided to jump on the haystack and roll around in the hay with another, other than you (their spouse / partner). If all my indicators are working properly, this romp in the hay constitutes an affair, does it not? It does. But... If you are to consider the circumstances of such an event, you may quickly be able to establish whether or not your marriage is even worth saving.
If, for example, the affair was premeditated - meaning that it was deviated by your spouse, they planned it - then your spouse is an idiot and you need to give him or her a fair old kick in the pants. If on the other hand, the affair was NOT premeditated, purely accidental, your spouse lost control of all muscular function except for those muscles located you know where and found himself or herself covered in hay almost involuntarily, then maybe you should consider giving them a second chance accompanied by a small kick in the pants just to make yourself feel a little bit better!
You see, a spouse that has cheated accidentally might still be worth keeping around, if not just to mow the lawn or do the washing, because if they are sorry, then you can almost guarantee that they will be a couple of hundred percent more careful in the future.
I hope my light hearted attempt at turning a bad situation into a humorous article that is easy to read does not offend you. Also, if you are at all leaning toward the rebuild my marriage side, then maybe you need to consider finding some outside help to save your marriage.
I wish you luck.
Saturday, February 12, 2011
How To Save A Broken Marriage
If you have found yourself struck by the brutal hand if infidelity, you are probably heart broken. Do not throw the key to your heart away just yet, though. It is too early!
If you are in the after the affair stage and you are finding yourself drained by unwanted images of your spouse and whomever they did the cheating with. Your mind has simply been captured by dirty images of the affair. It is very, very hard to break this thought process and expel these images because you do not know all of the details of the affair, and your mind is just filling in the gaps with details created by your very own imagination.
So, here are some tips that you can implement easily and effectively for the purpose of keeping your sanity during the healing phase.
1. Take those images and try to put them away somewhere, then try to manage the images by setting aside a few minutes of your day to let them out of the box. If they try to beat their way out of the box before you are ready to let them, push them aside by focussing on a happy image or any other thought that is unrelated. If you can manage the task of only dealing with these images when you are ready, you will have a better chance of deciphering what they mean.
2. Learning to focus on other areas of your life instead of just the sordid images of your spouse doing with another what they should have been doing with you is one of the steps toward surviving an affair.
Also, if you can understand that your marriage is like a ship and sometimes ships spring leaks which then need to be repaired, then you may understand that the option to rebuild your marriage is in fact a valid option.
If you are in the after the affair stage and you are finding yourself drained by unwanted images of your spouse and whomever they did the cheating with. Your mind has simply been captured by dirty images of the affair. It is very, very hard to break this thought process and expel these images because you do not know all of the details of the affair, and your mind is just filling in the gaps with details created by your very own imagination.
So, here are some tips that you can implement easily and effectively for the purpose of keeping your sanity during the healing phase.
1. Take those images and try to put them away somewhere, then try to manage the images by setting aside a few minutes of your day to let them out of the box. If they try to beat their way out of the box before you are ready to let them, push them aside by focussing on a happy image or any other thought that is unrelated. If you can manage the task of only dealing with these images when you are ready, you will have a better chance of deciphering what they mean.
2. Learning to focus on other areas of your life instead of just the sordid images of your spouse doing with another what they should have been doing with you is one of the steps toward surviving an affair.
Also, if you can understand that your marriage is like a ship and sometimes ships spring leaks which then need to be repaired, then you may understand that the option to rebuild your marriage is in fact a valid option.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Signs Of Cheating
Here's a thought! Maybe you are not yet 100% sure whether or not your spouse is having an affair or you may be running the thought of committing adultery through your very own mind as you are reading this now.
How can you be sure of whether or not your spouse is actually doing the deed with another? What are the signs of cheating? Here are some, just to give you an idea!
Signs Of Cheating.
1. You find birth control pills in her handbag or you have found that he is carrying a condom around in his wallet. There is NO reason for a married couple to even have the need for the above mentioned items... Unless you are newly weds and don't yet have any children. In that case, there probably still is a need for those items.
2. Your spouse gets all panicky whenever you even glance at their mobile phone or shuts down the computer whenever you are near. Possibly has something that they want to hide and it could very well be an adulterous affair with another.
3. The cheating spouse takes off his / her wedding ring before leaving the house to go out with friends. This usually means that they may have already met someone or they are on the lookout and want to appear to be single.
4. You find out that your spouse had taken a day off, but still told you that they were going to the office on that day. When in actual fact they were off somewhere else with another.
There are many, many more signs of cheating... But they are only signs and they should not be taking seriously unless you have reason to actually suspect that your spouse is having an affair. There are certain ways that WE (YOU) can find out for sure. One way is to simply just ask why they told you that they were working when they had a day off.... and then follow up by asking them to explain where they were on that day.
For a more comprehensive list of questions to ask your spouse when you suspect them of having an affair, visit - The Infidelity Authority
How can you be sure of whether or not your spouse is actually doing the deed with another? What are the signs of cheating? Here are some, just to give you an idea!
Signs Of Cheating.
1. You find birth control pills in her handbag or you have found that he is carrying a condom around in his wallet. There is NO reason for a married couple to even have the need for the above mentioned items... Unless you are newly weds and don't yet have any children. In that case, there probably still is a need for those items.
2. Your spouse gets all panicky whenever you even glance at their mobile phone or shuts down the computer whenever you are near. Possibly has something that they want to hide and it could very well be an adulterous affair with another.
3. The cheating spouse takes off his / her wedding ring before leaving the house to go out with friends. This usually means that they may have already met someone or they are on the lookout and want to appear to be single.
4. You find out that your spouse had taken a day off, but still told you that they were going to the office on that day. When in actual fact they were off somewhere else with another.
There are many, many more signs of cheating... But they are only signs and they should not be taking seriously unless you have reason to actually suspect that your spouse is having an affair. There are certain ways that WE (YOU) can find out for sure. One way is to simply just ask why they told you that they were working when they had a day off.... and then follow up by asking them to explain where they were on that day.
For a more comprehensive list of questions to ask your spouse when you suspect them of having an affair, visit - The Infidelity Authority
Save A Marriage After Infidelity
Infidelity can be one of the most difficult life problems that an couple can ever face. The truth of the matter is that NO couple should ever have to face the harshness of such a problem as dealing with a cheating spouse. Why, then has infidelity in marriage become such the problem that it is in this day and age?
It has become the problem that it is for the simple fact that more and more people are spending so much more of their time away from home and their spouses. This is because of a number of reasons - The need to work and finance the ever increasing cost of your life and your family's life is one such reason. Work creates stress and work stress is usually better dealt with by talking to and spending time with work mates, after all they are more able to understand the stresses that you are experiencing.
That is NO excuse though, and infidelity should not happen! It only happens because YOU or YOUR SPOUSE have allowed it to happen. So, how is it possible to save a marriage after infidelity?
1. You need to try to understand the root cause of why YOU or YOUR SPOUSE has chosen to tread the path of infidelity. Is there something missing from your marriage? Maybe it is something that was there before, but isn't there now. Togetherness, maybe! Just a thought.
2. Once you can identify one or more reasons why this dreadful roadblock has been thrust in your way, you may get straight to the task of learning how to save your marriage.
3. It doesn't even matter if both parties want to repair the damage or not. Provided that ONE of you wants to rebuild your marriage - IT CAN BE DONE!
Therefore, if you are at all interested in learning how to save a marriage after infidelity (YOUR MARRIAGE), you can find more information at The Infidelity Authority
It has become the problem that it is for the simple fact that more and more people are spending so much more of their time away from home and their spouses. This is because of a number of reasons - The need to work and finance the ever increasing cost of your life and your family's life is one such reason. Work creates stress and work stress is usually better dealt with by talking to and spending time with work mates, after all they are more able to understand the stresses that you are experiencing.
That is NO excuse though, and infidelity should not happen! It only happens because YOU or YOUR SPOUSE have allowed it to happen. So, how is it possible to save a marriage after infidelity?
1. You need to try to understand the root cause of why YOU or YOUR SPOUSE has chosen to tread the path of infidelity. Is there something missing from your marriage? Maybe it is something that was there before, but isn't there now. Togetherness, maybe! Just a thought.
2. Once you can identify one or more reasons why this dreadful roadblock has been thrust in your way, you may get straight to the task of learning how to save your marriage.
3. It doesn't even matter if both parties want to repair the damage or not. Provided that ONE of you wants to rebuild your marriage - IT CAN BE DONE!
Therefore, if you are at all interested in learning how to save a marriage after infidelity (YOUR MARRIAGE), you can find more information at The Infidelity Authority
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